Here we go....
1. I did not assume the deep freeze had been empty for a while, since Avery started to refuse breastmilk, so I did not decide we should probably sell it. I did not open it to find a bag of breastmilk from March 2008 nicely frozen, labeled and organized. I did not decide not to mention this to Charlie, unless he happens to read the blog, because it would probably really gross him out. Oh by the way, I have this barely used, great deep freeze for sale - anyone interested? Ha!
2. I did not go venture into a children's clothing store in town, without really meaning to, and proceed to buy the 'hoochie mama dress' and a few other things. When the nice clerk asked which branch of Chase I worked at, I did not get a little freaked out and ask, "How do you know I work at Chase???" He did not kindly reply, "Ummmm, well...your t-shirt, ma'am." Yes, of course, plastered across my chest were the letters C-H-A-S-E. I did not say "Wow, some days I am such a blonde!" and then leave quickly, never even explaining which one I worked at!
3. I did not get a bit stressed at work after I had to do the late night privacy audit last Monday and tell my boss I wouldn't be in until 9 on Tuesday. I had not planned on sleeping in and decide sleeping in was a waste of time when I could be grocery shopping. So I certainly did not wake up at 5am, as usual, get myself and Avery ready, and head off to WalMart on an early Tuesday morning. I assure you, the parking lot looked like pure heaven and one side was completely empty. Wow! I thought, what a great idea. I'll park on this side and get the first spot! I did not figure out, upon waiting for the automatic door to open, that it was so early the doors on one side were still locked and my great idea wasn't so great after all. And that would probably explain why I was the only car on that side.
4. I also did not quickly rip open a box of Nilla Wafers when Avery started to get a bit antsy in the buggy (for you Northerners, buggy = shopping cart). And I certainly did not sit the box of Nilla Wafers beside her in the buggy and let her go.to.town for the rest of the time in the store. Whatever works...right?
*CPS Disclaimer: Avery had a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast before we left, so I counted those cookies as her 'morning snack!'
5. I did not give into the demanding princess when she was having meltdowns waiting in the car after the fireworks. She was not allowed OUT of the car seat for a few minutes while we sat in a parking lot, not moving for what seemed like an hour. She was not a little too tired to behave herself and sit nicely in her car seat.
*CPS Disclaimer: Once traffic started moving, she was promptly snapped in her seat for the ride home!
6. I certainly, after posting a previous post about DEFINITELY NOT wanting another 'one' right now, did not try to convince my husband that we should adopt a little boy that lives in the neighborhood and is not well taken care of. Charlie did not vehemently refuse and insist that instead, I should call CPS so someone will "brush his teeth" and "clean him up". If Charlie had agreed to adopt him, I would never consider walking down to his house and knocking on the door requesting that I take him home. Never, ever, ever. Poor Harvey.
*CPS Disclaimer: Harvey is not his real name, I'll call you later with all the details.